Welcome to the section of the SVC-CAMFT newsletter, Legal Beagle written by Darlene Davis, LMFT. The chapter thought it would be helpful to keep you updated on new laws, legislative pursuits or actions, as well as ongoing legal and ethical dilemmas we all face in our career as Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists, Interns, and Trainees. Please feel free to ask questions that you have and I will do my best to investigate and post your answer in the newsletter. Please note that articles are based on information from CAMFT and/or the BBS and have been researched to the best of my ability. This is not meant to be legal advice.  Please contact CAMFT or Board of Behavioral Sciences for any legal matters you need assistance for.

I am having a difficult time thinking that it is November already! It’s not that time flies by like a bird it’s that I seem to never have time to finish what I need to accomplish (or want to accomplish). I hope that the articles you have read throughout this year have been helpful. I think it’s important to stay current on what is happening in our profession and in our organizations.

With that said you will soon receive voting ballots to “reinstate” the 2009 bylaws. CAMFT recently voted “To approve the repeal of the current bylaws approved in July 2013 and reinstate the bylaws adopted in June 2009. The Board’s approval is subject to voting clinical members’ approval by ballot.”

A “Yes” vote on the ballot means the June 2009 bylaws will be reinstated. A “No” vote on the ballot means the July 2013 bylaws will remain in effect. Please take some time to make your decision about what is best for our organization and its future. 

Also wanted to address changes to the Law and Ethics Exam structure which was supposed to go into effect January 2014. Because of eBreeze (the new database that will eventually make our life better) the BBS needed to utilize all staff in its implementation and did not want it to interfere with the new Law and Ethics Exam structure. This means that if you have not entered into the exam process by January 2016 you will need to take the Law and Ethics test. More to come as we get closer to 2016!

Lastly those of you that are retired or thinking of retiring your LMFT license please note new changes in the law as of January 2014.

• If your retired license was issued prior to January 1, 2014: You may apply to restore your retired license to active status if it was issued less than five years prior to the application date. After this date, if you wish to resume practice you will be required to take the Board’s current examinations and meet its current education and experience requirements for licensure.

• If your retired license was issued on or after January 1, 2014: You may apply to restore your retired license to active status if it was issued less than three years prior to the application date. After this date, if you wish to resume practice you will be required to take the Board’s current examinations and meet its current education and experience requirements for licensure.

See you all next year!

Darlene Davis, LMFT
Executive Director HOPE; Healthy Outcomes for Personal Enrichment
MFT Stipend Coordinator for Greater Sacramento
Instructor of University of Phoenix
www.darlenedavismft.com
www.hope-counselingcenter.org

"Failure to Launch" is a term used to describe the continuing dependency of young adults on their parents beyond the adolescent years. Mr. Phillips described how issues such has a depressed job market, young adults becoming addicted to various substances, or lack of a nurturing home environment can contribute to this failure to launch.  The solution proposed is to increase relational competency.  Relational competency is the readiness to enter into relationships of mutuality and trust, characterized by authentic dialogue that leads to continual growth and learning.  Many parents may not be adept at how to communicate to their children despite considering themselves good communicators; this is where a Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT) can step in and help.  When parents develop partnerships with their children they can move into needed continual growth and learning.  The main issue that prevents relational competency is communication pitfalls, such as assumptions, not asking questions, needing to be right, blaming, lack of active listening, and providing absolutes.

An MFT will help parents to move out of seeing only their reality where they find comfort toward creating a shared reality with their children.  Ultimately trying to understand their child’s reality will produce discomfort as their child’s reality and style of communication will be different from theirs’; these differences produce conflict with most people wanting to avoid such conflict.  An intuitive MFT will help parents work through their discomfort by moving people to increased awareness of each other’s values and increase alignment with their children’s values.

Root values can be viewed with a matrix of different polarities.  Some people will be more active/extroverted while others will be more reflective/introverted.  As well, people will move toward poles of valuing relationships or valuing completion of tasks.  Depending on where a person lands on this matrix will define four relationship styles of directing, inspiring, influencing, and exploring.  When children are moving through their life their parents will need to learn to be agile with their relationship styles; relational agility serves relational competency by helping the child/young adult move from directing, to exploring, to influencing, and to inspiring modeled by their parents.  For example, if a child is dealing with drugs a parent may at first be directing telling them they must stop the behavior. Once there, a parent can move toward exploring what other areas of life would be healthier for the child to set goals toward. Once goals are established, the parent can flexibly influence their child on how to meet those new goals. Finally, as goals are met the parent moves to inspire their child to continue on the child’s own.

The communication pitfalls develop when a parent is not fluid with their relationship style.  Rather than adjusting to the relationship style the child needs, the parents stay in their own relationship style that is easier and more comfortable to them. Unfortunately, by doing this, the child then experiences the directing parent as dictating, the influencing parent as manipulating, the exploring parent as one avoiding or indecisive, or the inspiring parent as enabling. Parents must be “diagonally challenged” (based on the matrix shown in the training) to meet the needs of the child’s relationship style. The MFT will help the parent to relationally process and diagonally challenge their relationship style by helping a parent pace their response (accelerate or decelerate), communicate by making statements or asking questions, and address goals or process. For example, since the directing parent is prone to actively/quickly attend to tasks, an MFT will help him to decrease his reaction by asking open ended questions (rather than make demands/statements) to address his child’s personal process (feelings not tasks/goals).

The training was fascinating and provides great insight to providing some tools for therapists to help parents better communicate with their child who is having a hard time launching.  More time afforded to the concepts would have been helpful to enhance understanding the material. Nonetheless, Mr. Phillips did an excellent job providing insight in how to create a safe environment for parents to creatively deal with conflict and provide relational tools to assist their children mature and succeed in life.

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