As a therapist I have been struggling the past couple of weeks.  A lot of my clients are minorities.  Whether people of color or non-Christian religions or LGBTQ - they all are coming to me with anxiety and fear.  I have always understood that I can never understand what it is to walk out of the house and automatically be persecuted, so I have been very careful about dismissing fears.  I understand there are truly problems such as "Driving While Black" or the children that are considered to have discipline problems when they have had a traumatic history.  I work with their very real fears and try to help them live the best they can without their fears running their lives.

Suddenly, I have clients that have very real in the moment valid fears that are no longer quantifiable or reliable.  Previously I could help a teenager of color who has started driving, how to give them the best possibility of not having police hostility.  I could help a family know the words and what paperwork they need so their child gets the help they need in school.  I have a client that went out of the country (Mexico) for a destination wedding who although they have a green card cannot get back into the country as of this writing.  She cannot get back to her children, her job or anything else.  All I could do was to help her get a hold of an attorney. 

I work with a lot of transgender clients, and they are scared of being beaten up for being in the wrong restroom. Children are experiencing bullying for being Muslim or an immigrant or someone of color and it seems to be getting worse.  I no longer have statistics or suggestions on how to make fear a minimal part of their lives.  I cannot say as I have in the past "Don't worry, while presidents have some power, they are only one part of the system so we usually don't see that many harsh changes."

What I do know I can do is to understand their fears and not minimize them.  Look up phone numbers and be involved enough to be able to get people the information they may need if there is a problem.  I try to work with the adults to teach their children to be cautious while still making sure we do not overwhelm the children and they still are able to laugh and play.

I remind all of my clients to still laugh and love and try to take breaks from the news.  I remind them to live in the moment while still doing what they can to protect themselves and lower their fear.  For many getting involved at any level in what they are afraid of allows them to feel some sense of control and helps them connect to others. 

What I try to impart to them is not to pull away from those they love.  Do not hide in fear, for the more isolated we are the more fearful we can become.  These are turbulent times that are scary for many of us.  For me this means sitting with my client and not trying to minimize their fear but instead understand it and work within that fear to help them find some balance in their lives despite their very real fears.